The Power of Tension
Posted by Lissa
Cally Jackson Writes and Rachel Morgan Writes are hosting a Blogfest on tension in fiction.
Rules: “Give us an excerpt (up to 300 words) from your manuscript or recently completed work (or just a random scene) that drips with tension and will tie us in knots wanting to know more. It doesn’t matter what the piece is about, as long as it screams tension.”
Check out the other rules at either of the writing websites hosting above.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you an excerpt from near the end of Darkwalker, Book 2 of the Innocence Saga (to be published later this year), between my heroine, Innocence, and mysterious, violent, unpredictable Rome. High fantasy has a lot of back story and world building, and this was just about the only thing I could find over both books that was condensed enough to fit the 300 word limit.
“You know your problem?” He suddenly loomed taller and angrier than I’d seen him before. “You think you’re too good for me.”
“What?” I retorted, refusing to back down even though he was a good few inches taller than me. “That’s the complete opposite of what I think. Rome, don’t you know the dangers of being with a banshee? Especially if you’ve been tainted?”
“I’m completely aware of the dangers. I’m not stupid, contrary to what you think. But you know, it wouldn’t hurt to give it a try. It’s not like I’m the only one here who has killed anyone.” He moved as if to walk away. I grabbed his arm.
“The last thing I want in this world is to hurt you.”
He turned to me; put his arms around my waist. Surprised, his closeness hit me strongly and flooded me with adrenalin. His scent swirled around me – both his unwashed body odour and the smell of his sin. My heart thundered as he put his mouth close to my ear. His voice was barely a whisper. “You’re hurting me by refusing me.”
“What can I do?” My voice dropped low, my eyes pleading, my arms automatically curling around him. “You don’t understand.”
He dropped his head so we were at eye level. I inhaled his sweet breath – it made me dizzy with desire.
Well, folks: what do you think? Let’s have some comment love and retweets!
Check out the other entries here. It’s well worth a look!
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Posted on May 23, 2011, in Bloghop, Darkwalker (Innocence Saga #2) and tagged books, Fantasy, Fantasy literature, Fiction, Literature, publishing, self-publishing, stories, Writer, Writing. Bookmark the permalink. 53 Comments.









Great entry – I’m a sucker for a little romance!
You might like the book then: there’s very little romance… see what I did there? LOL. Thank you.
>Rome, don’t you know the dangers of being with a banshee?
One weak denial and she changes the subject? If I were him, I’d be suspicious
If I were my heroine, the book wouldn’t have happened this way
LOL, I don’t know the dangers, but it sounds fascinating. I love that he doesn’t just give up. Nice job!
Give up? Pfft. Where’s the fun in that? Thank you for the comment.
I loved it, nice job!
Thank you very much!
The “banshee” bit definitely grabbed my interest.
Good, I was worried for a while no one would want to read paranormal books that didn’t follow established guidelines with over-utilised creatures.
Nothing like that good old ‘love/hate’ tension to build up some suspense! Reminds me why I love these kinds of stories. Good job!
The love/hate relationship was one of my favourite things to write. Thank you!
Ooh, hot! And tense. I’m curious about the banshee part, too, and what he is that he smells like sin.
He’s human, but he’s a very bad boy LOL. Thank you.
Nice! Yummy
and yeah, I haven’t read about banshees before, at least not outside of Greek Myth classes at uni
Thank you. I am trying to bring banshees out of the darkness of obscurity.
Wonderful job here. I loved the tension between the two and the spark. Yay!
Sparks can be dangerous. Thank you for your lovely comment.
Oooh, I think this is the first one I’ve read with sexual tension. Very nice!
Thanks for entering, Lissa. (And sorry the word limit made it so tricky for you!)
Oh, it turns out to all have worked for the best if this is one of the few with sexual tension, I suppose! Thanks for hosting.
Dripping with sexual tension! Rome sounds yummy! Wonder why she must refuse him? Good job.
He’s the brother of Innocence’s best friend, and also, if they get ‘intimate’, she’ll kill him. Inherent banshee flaw.
I love how you used all the senses here. It really makes the scene come alive. Great job.
Thank you very much.
Oh I hope it works out for them. I’m a sucker for an HEA (and romance). Great job!
Oooh, better not give away any spoilers then
Loving it so far. Vey tense.
Thanks a lot!
Tension created by desire. Nice one! :O)
The best kind of conflict is unfulfilled desire, in my opinion
This is the first time I’ve read about banshee. Very intriguing and you set up nice tension in this seen. Well done.
Thank you, banshees are my particular fascination.
Oooo, I love feuding lovers, which probably says some interesting things about me. I’m hooked, I want to know what the dangers are.
Well I won’t give away precious spoilers, but you’re more than welcome to read the book when it’s published later this year and find out
Yummy sexual tension with the smell of sin. Loved it!
Thanks very much!
That was a great entry..nothing sizzles more than sexual and moral tension!
Thanks for your lovely comment on my blog.
Thank you, I love writing about those two… kinda naughty and nice at the same time. Cheers!
I enjoyed this! I’m especially intrigued by the whole “banshee” bit!
Thank you! I hope the rest of the book is as well-received.
Romance and tension; the perfect combination! Loved it.
Thanks a bunch! I liked your excerpt – very brave to be writing a sci-fi. I hope it finds a resurgence soon (especially after this dystopia craze). I’ve also written a sci-fi, and it’s a genre very dear to me.
Ooh, nice! A whole ‘nother level of tension from the entries I’ve read so far. I definitely want to read the rest!
Cheers, thank you for the endorsement!
A banshee? Interesting! Haven’t seen one of those as a main character before! Well done with getting some tension in there.
Thanks for entering
Thank you, and thank you for hosting such a fun contest!
Very nice – I’m a sucker for the romantic, and I LOVE me those bad boys! Lol… Good job!
Thanks so much!
Oh, some sexual tension, nice! And I love the name Rome ^_^
Thank you very much. He went through a few name changes before I settled on Rome. Cheers!
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